Monday, June 29, 2009

Sexy vs. Beautiful

Yo and hello.

My apologies to you all for not updating sooner. Last week was hectic, with me going out of town for three days. But don't worry. I plan to make up for my absence because there's been a lot on my mind since I returned.

I went back to my alma mater to take care of some financial aid business, as well as visit a friend. But more on that later. When I was dropped off at the bus terminal--Grey Hound is the way to go in this economy lol--I was about an hour early. So, I went inside of the terminal Subway restaurant to order something to tie me over until I got home from my 2-3 hour trip. There was a family of 8 ahead of me and they were all making complicated orders so I knew it would be a while before I got to the counter.

As the line slowly crept forward, I noticed the guy who was making the sandwiches and ringing them up kept looking at me. He was attractive. About 5'9, cocoa brown skin, dark brown eyes, cute smile. He looked at me apologetically and mouthed "I'm so sorry..." as he made eyes at the large family ahead of me. I laughed and shook my ahead, telling him it was totally fine.

I finally made it to the counter and placed my order for a Veggie Delight. He gave me a look. "You're a vegetarian?" I smiled sheepishly. "Oh...yeah. Just recently." He smiled back and said. "That's cool." He finished my sandwich and we proceeded to the register. I gave him my money, and as he gave me my change, he said, "Before you leave, I just have to tell you...I think you're really beautiful." I took my change, and smiled (probably a little too hard) and said, "Awww, thank you." We gave each other one last smile, and I left.

When I decided to ditch the weaves and wear my hair natural, I knew that there would be a decline in the amount of guys who would try to talk to me. Because, let's just be real, natural hair is far from the highest standard of African American beauty. On top of that, I'm not light skinned, I don't have thin facial features, and I don't have what so many black people love to call "good" hair, so that puts my appeal even lower on the totem pole. Again, we're just being real here. While it does suck that black women with darker skin tones and kinky hair are somehow considered less attractive, I'm not phased a tiny bit. I take pride in the way I look. My darker complexion, my kinky hair, my round, full features. It took me years to really love my Blackness, and the status quo isn't going to change that.

Now, you may be wondering the significance of the aforementioned story. From my experience in most of my young adult life, I have never been addressed to by a guy in the manner I was the other day. The most I've ever gotten was "Ay ma! You lookin' sexy as hell today!" Hearing those words make my skin crawl. For me, no attention is better than bad attention, so I was more than happy to part with the hits that my old look attracted. It doesn't validate me, nor does it flatter me. But, while I realized that I probably wouldn't be approached in that way anymore, I hadn't anticipated was the positive attention that my new look would attract.

I'm starting to notice that a whole different breed of men talk to me now. Their looks are more refined, their demeanors are more subtle, their words are more complimentary, their actions are more flattering, and they are all around more respectful. And a little more mature too. Granted, it was a very small compliment. And, while I hate that someone else's opinion of me me meant so much, I really appreciated it. The best part was that he wasn't even hitting on me. He didn't try to get my number or anything. He just paid me a very decent compliment. It makes me a kind of giddy inside to realize that I'm going to meet my future husband with my natural hair. Right off the bat, he'll accept me for who I am instead of questioning me. He's going to find me attractive and not wonder why I wear my hair this way.

As I said before, I'm often called sexy, but very rarely called beautiful. While I do appreciate the compliment, I really don't like being called sexy. More often than not, what the guy is commenting on when he calls me that, is my body. In my opinion at least, being called beautiful is much more flattering. "Sexy" is just a phyiscal word. But "beautiful" can be interpreted on the surface level as well as on the intellectual level. Maybe that's just me though...

Ladies, which do you consider more of a compliment--being called Sexy or Beautiful?

P.S.

I replied to your comments on my previous post. Thank you all for your wonderful feedback! : )

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Just a heads up...

For the next few days, I'll be experimenting with new layouts, templates, and colors. If you see my blog looking janky from one moment to the next, that's why.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Channnnges.

Hey lovely people! How were your weekends?

You guys wouldn't believe how drama-filled my life has been since returning home. LOTS-O-DRAMA. But I'm very happy to say that I survived my first week back. Of course it's easy to be on Cloud Nine when you're in peace and solitude. But the real test began when I was forced into stressful sitcheeations. And your girl has definitely learned to handle them with poise and grace ::slowly bows::.

A popular comment I've been getting from the fellas that I knew prior to the camp is that I seem "different". I've also been called a lame, a prude, and an asshole. I won't deny that my perspective on life has changed a lot. But am I different? I'd have to say no. Personality wise, I'm definitely the same person. It's just that I found a lot of strength within that I never knew I had. Realized how capable I am. How worthy I am. And I realized that people come and go, but you have to live with yourself forever. So, do what makes you happy. Do what makes you proud. And if people don't like it, oh wellsies. You can't please everybody.

I know I'm being cryptic here, but it's for a reason. I'm not sure yet whether or not I'm speaking from personal experience. There have certainly been people who don't like the changes that I've made in my life. They're having a hard time getting used to how things are now, but I'm giving them time. We'll see if they can accept me how I am. I'll give you guys more insight a little later, depending on how things pan out. In the meantime, we shall wait....

Annnnywhoozers, I have to say that I've been feeling really good lately. I've continued meditating everyday for at least one hour--the two hour thing proved to be a little too demanding--and it really helps keep me centered. I might not be on my way to becoming a Buddha, but I definitely can see progress, and that's good enough for me. As I told you guys last week, I'm trying vegetarianism on for size and so far, it's a lifestyle that I can definitely keep up with. Prior to going to the camp, I was already considering it because meat has not been my friend lately. So, it served as a perfect segue to get me used to not eating it. Ever since I stopped, I've definitely felt healthier, lighter, less tired, and not nauseated. Seems like something I definitely can stick with because I'm not missing meat at all.

Along with going veggie, while I was at the camp, I also went natural. Y'all know what I mean. I'm sporting my naPPtural hair now. I stopped getting perms around October 2007, because I completely damaged my hair when I got a relaxer and highlights less than a month apart. When I stopped with the perms, I started wearing weaves and never wore my natural hair out. I planned on it eventually, but my hair was so unhealthy that I wasn't ready to deal with it yet. So for the past year or so, I've been wearing braids and sew-ins. It originally started as a way to grow my perm out but I realized how much I loved the versatility of i, so I kept wearing sew-ins--some long, some short--to change up my look every once and a while.

Well, while I was at the camp, my latest short 'do started driving me crazy. The day they told us not to react to physical sensations was the day my head decided to start itching like mad. Before long, I cut the weave out, unbraided my hair, and wore it natural for the rest of the time. When I got home, I deep conditioned and moisturized. Now I'm quickly starting to realized how healthy my hair is, and how much I really love my natural texture. I got my first kiddie relaxer when I was six and had them up until the age of 17. That's when I started wearing weaves. So, for the first time, in my life really, I'm wearing my natural hair out.


I might rock this protective style, and others like it, for a little while before I start experimenting with more creative ones. This might prove to be a difficult task for me because I love switching up my look every month or so, but I'm going to tough it out. Mostly because I like how healthy and strong it is right now, and I'm afraid of putting too much strain on it. My hair has grown more than I had realized (a little past my back now when stretched) and it's very thick and full. By Fall, when I have a little more length and a concrete regimen, I'll start thinking outside the box. I can tell that my options are going to be pretty endless when it comes to styling. Been hitting up Fotki pages and I'm getting tons of inspiration. If any of you ladies out there have a Fotki page, can you share a little insight on how to set up and get things started?

And while we're talking about makeovers, I'm thinking this blog needs one. I've had this color scheme and header for about a year now and it's time for something new. Any ideas? I'm open to anything. Also, if there's anyone out there who's good at making banners and doesn't charge out the a$$, please leave a comment or email me: riprue@yahoo.com

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Vipassana: Days 1-4

Note: I've divided this post into 3 parts because it got so long. Start here and work your way down :).

Hey lovely people!

I made it home yesterday, but I needed a day or so as a buffer. Getting back into the real world was a little tougher than I thought it would be. Going from complete silence and calm, to a world of noise and such a sense of urgency was a little much for the first day. I decided to not get straight to the blogging so I wouldn't overstimulate myself.

It's funny, I felt like I was thinking about the post I was going to make the whole time. Planning it out paragraph by paragraph in my mind, day by day. But now as I sit here trying to recall the past ten days, it's like a blur. It all seems so distant and far away because so much happened.

But let me quit with the crypticness and cut to it. Before I go into my experience though, I think I should give you another brief reminder of exactly what Vipassana is and what the course hopes to achieve. This is a really short video that sums up the course better (and quicker) than I ever could.





There are only a handful of Vipassana Meditation Centers throughout the world and I was lucky enough to be relatively near one (about 2 hours). The one I went to is located in Pecatonia, IL. Doesn't ring a bell? It shouldn't. It's basically in the middle of Bufuland. Surrounded by cornfields, you'd expect the site to resemble an old ranch or farmhouse. But when you actually get there, you see that it's a quaint little acre of land with nature trails, ponds, and gardens. Instead of housing all the areas we'd be occupying in one building, they were divided into three small ones: the dining hall, the dormitory, and the place where we meditated. They were all spread far apart from each other, so every day was basically a nature walk. The whole set up was very cozy, tranquil, and beautiful--not at all what you'd expect. I'm really sad I didn't get any pictures of the campus because, I didn't bring my camera :-/

Anyway, because my mom sucks at being on time, we got there after check in. Most of the other students had already arrived and were waiting for the last few stragglers to make it. I dropped off my clothes and bedding in the dormitory, and then headed to the orientation. There was a short introduction and a reminder of the moral code of discipline. We were given five precepts that we were to respect for the duration of the course: No killing, no stealing, no sexual misconduct, no telling lies, and no intoxicants. After the orientation, we headed to our rooms to change into something more comfortable for meditation. When we made it back to the hall, the men and women were separated and Noble Silence began. We meditated for an hour that night and then went to bed at 9pm.

Day 1-4

The first fours days were a matter of just getting accustomed to things. The new schedule, the nature, the animals, the silence, the food, the meditating. Surprisingly, I found the transition relatively easy. It was nice to be in silence, away from everyday stimuli and the fast pace of the world. Everything was laid back, quiet, relaxing, and calm. The scenery was just amazing, and, my favorite part: there were animals everywhere. Chipmunks, frogs, flocks of geese, litters of woodchucks, butterflies, birds of like 12 different species. And they all cohabited peacefully. The only part that I never got used to were the bugs. Ugh. They were everywhere. And, because we agreed to the precept of not killing any being, I'd have to either ignore the fact that there was an epic Jurassic Park looking bug an inch from my face, or I'd have to suck it up and take it outside. So, I had to grow gigantic balls about six times to catch and free bugs.

By far the easiest thing to get used to was the food lol. I'm not a huge meet eater, but I still though that going to vegetarian cuisine would be difficult. Not only that, but our meal schedule was that we ate breakfast at 6:30am, lunch at 11am, and then tea and fruit at 5pm. And that would be our last "meal" of the day. I was pretty sure I'd starve to death. But surprisingly, the vegetarian food was delicious. I had been contemplating going vegetarian for a while, but I didn't want to make the jump because I thought it would be too expensive. But the truth is, with a little creativity, you can come up with a lot of recipes just from ingredients you already have. Seeing as I didn't miss meat at all during my time there, I figured I'd give it a long term try.

So, now. All of that stuff aside, you probably want to know about the meditation itself, huh? Well, that was definitely the hardest part of this entire experience. On days 1-3, we practiced the simple technique of observing our respiration. As the video said, we were to just focus on the action of breathing through the nose and nothing else. Just be aware, like a silent observer, of the natural passage of the breath. Sounds simple enough right? I challenge you right now to stop reading, close your eyes, focus on your breathing through the nose, and see how long it is before your mind wanders. Go ahead, I'll wait.

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How long did it take, 10 seconds? 5? 3? After practicing the breathing, you quickly realize just how wild and rebellious your mind is. You can't even focus on your own breathing for longer than 10 seconds before your mind starts to go. And when you try to bring it back, 2 seconds later your thinking about something else. This was the point of this the first two days. To just make you aware of how the mind works and how fleeting it is. After hours and hours and HOOOOUUUUURRRRS of practice, I eventually was able to control the wandering a little better. But no sooner that I almost had that part down, there was something new to learn.

On the third day the teacher introduced the second phase of the technique (anapana). Now that we were more aware of our breathing, we were to try to focus on feeling of sensation. In the area just below the nose and above the lip, we were to observe any sensations we felt. An itch, a tingle, pain, feeling, numbness, heat, coolness, pressure, vibrations, perspiration etc. Just any feeling that we had in this small area. The point of this technique was to further discipline the mind. Zeroing in on a such a small part of the body sharpens your mind's ability to stay focused. After practicing the breathing, I found that this part wasn't difficult at all. It was actually kind of easy to actually detect sensations. But once again, as soon as I had that part down, the Big Kahuna was thrown at us: Vipassana.

Vipassana: Days 5-10

Days 5-9: Vipassana and the Law of Impermanence


In this phase of the technique, we were to survey the sensations of the entire body, from head to toe. This is soooooo much easier said than done. To mentally make your mind focus on your body inch by inch is just not in its nature. It took me days and days, about 20 hours of meditation in different sittings, to finally get it down. But once again, at the point I felt a little more confident in the technique, another challenge was thrown as us.


Ordinarily in our group sittings, while we meditated, we were allowed to move around. If your butt got numb, you could shift positions or grab a different mediation cushion. If you wanted to open your eyes every now and again, you could. If you got cold, you could grab a blanket or shawl. But on day five, we were to observe a new technique of Strong Determination where, for an entire hour we wouldn't move an inch. So, if you felt an itch, you wouldn't scratch it. If your back hurt, you wouldn't change your posture. The point was to sit in the same position for a full hour, no matter how uncomfortable you felt. No matter what unpleasant sensations arose. You were to remain equanimous the entire time and not react to anything.


Before I get too deep into this part of the technique, I think I should give a little more background about it. Once we got to this point, I definitely went through a period of frustration. After 45 minutes of sitting in the same spot, you're body is just going to get tired. You're back and shoulder hurts, your butt hurts, and every area that has been in contact with a hard surface will be numb. I couldn't understand the point of sitting there in pain for an hour, so when we first started this part of the technique, I was a little rebellious. I'd stretch and scratch, and move as much as I pleased. It wasn't until after the instructor gave his discourse at the end of the day, that I understood the purpose of the practice and how it relates to life.


By nature, human beings are a very ego-centered, self-indulgent species. Our lives are centered around craving and aversion: I want this, I don't want that. We love things to go our way, and when they don't, which is quite often in life, we become very agitated and unhappy. All addictions are born of craving, and disappointments are born of aversion. We're constantly trying to satisfy something, constantly searching for some type of pacification or elimination. We get so attached to wanting or not wanting something, that when we don't get it, we fall apart. For instance, I wanted Ex to "choose" me so bad. When he didn't, it broke my heart. It made me crave him even more and I fought like mad to get him back. Every time he rejected me, it broke me down but I'd keep going back. My desire for him multiplied and I was addicted to him. I craved his affection and acceptance, and because I didn't get it, I was miserable.


In the same way, I was miserable during these meditations. In this one hour sitting, all you want to do is move. You're uncomfortable and you want to be comfortable. When you have the desire to move, and you can't, you become miserable in that moment. The purpose of not reacting to a pain in your back or a numbness on your butt, or an itch on your leg, is to deny body of what it wants. Instead of giving in to a craving, you're silently observing what you feel without showing any aversion to it. There are times too, when meditatimg, that you feel a subtle, pleasant vibrating sensation throughout the body. In these instances, you keep your poker face as well, and don't react. If something feels bad, you don't react. If it feels good, you don't react. You're training your mind to just remain cool, calm, and collected. Once while meditating, I had this killer itch on my back that I was certain I'd die from. But I never scratched it and, to my amazement, it eventually went away. After a while, this you start to realize that every sensation you feel is impermanent. Everything--the good and the bad.

In the context of Vipassana, the body is a metaphor for life. You realize that nothing in life is permanent. Everything passes. It's the Law of Nature. Everything that begins has an end. When I was able to accept this fact, things became so much easier, not just in the technique, but in life. You just realize that nothing is worth getting bent out of shape over. Nothing is worth getting so invested in that you lose yourself when things don't go your way. When you practice the technique of equanimity and non-reaction, you're automatically a lot calmer in handling things. You don't have to tell yourself to keep your cool, you just do. It's natural to.


I definitely had my moments when I was skeptical. Does this mean I can't enjoy things? That I can't even want or not things??? But soon, I realized that it's not about eliminating desire. It's about just squashing whatever makes us get so attached to things in life. But who wants to live a detached life, right? It's not detachment to the point of becoming a sociopathic zombie. It's just a detachment where, you dictate how you feel, not something external. By reaching inside yourself, you discover the ability to control your own happiness. It's never anyone else's fault. No one and nothing has power over us. We're the masters of our own fate. Once we learn how to react to the curve balls that life throws at us, with a calm unaffected mind, we can think clearly. And times when you do get flustered and upset, the agitation passes quicker. It's all because you realize that it's all impermenant and there's no use getting stressed about something that won't matter in another ten minutes.

Days 5-9 were days of a lot of revelations, epiphanies, and just becoming stronger in the technique. By the 10th day, I definitely felt the benefits of the meditation because I felt genuinely happy. Alot of the baggage and pain that I've harbored for so many people and situations had resolved themselves, and I just felt good.

Day 10

As it was the last day before going back into the real world, on Day 10 the Noble Silence was lifted. We were finally able to each other about what we were experiencing. Day 10 was just as important as Days 1-9, but I want go in depth because of how long this already is. But it's was just pretty amazing to see how much it did for people, and how much it help people move on from pains they'd be holding on to.

Day 11: Back to Reality

I hadn't realized how different it would be coming back to the real world. While I was there, I felt so happy, positive, and self-assured. And then I left the center and realized just how negative the world is. At first I held my bearing and was able to retain my peace of mind, but by the end of the day I was exhausted and a little disheartened. There really is so much negativity and hostility out there, and just because I've come out of my misery doesn't mean the world has. It just made me realize that I'll really have to continue the practice in order to not let the negativity of others get me down.

Vipassana: Reflection

Bhavatu Sabba Mangalam/May all beings be happy.

In one of the discourses, the teacher mentioned how, once you've experienced the benefits of Vipassana, all you'll want to do is tell people about it. People who love to talk will want to give lectures and people who love to write, will want to write about their full experience. Either way, you just want to get the word out about how rewarding Vipassana is. Turns out, he was completely right.

What I like most about the experience is that I still feel like myself. You know how when Christians get saved, they're all "born again" perfect, rehabilitated angels for about a month, and then they go back to their own ways? No judgment here, but getting saved sets such a high bar. Being human, you're naturally going to relapse. After coming home, I really did think at one point I'd come home all Zenned out, weirdly peaceful, and zombie-like. But to my surprise, and my family's, I was more chatty than ever, and still the same me. The only effect its had is that I'm calmer. I feel like my mind was purified of alot of negativity's I've accumulated over the past few years and that's just amazing to me. Things that I swore I'd never get over, resentments I'd thought I'd die with, grudges that I didn't even know I was holding--gone. And what's left is a calmer, more peaceful me.

The coolest part about all of it is that Vipassana can be practiced by anybody. Because the technique is common in the Buddhist religion, I was sure that some cult-ish things would sneak up somewhere in the discourse, but it was just the opposite. The whole thing is completely free from sectarianism and religion. It's practical and reasonable, the science of the relationship between mind and matter. It's a lifestyle, not a rite or ritual, so any religious beliefs you have are unaffected. You don't feel like you're being brainwashed or anything bizarre like that. You're just learning a simple technique that will liberate you from the bondage and attachment to negative things in your life.

The most amazing thing? It was completely FREE. For ten days, I stayed at the lovely facility, had healthy and delicious meals, was completely accommodated of everything thing I needed (forgotten toiletries, clothing, linen, meditation cushions, etc.) without a cost to me. The whole thing is run by volunteers and donations. Each course costs over $10,000 but we are asked to pay nothing. Only after you've done a 10 day course, are you "allowed" to donate. You can't help but want to after realizing how beneficial and rewarding it is. And also realizing the fact that this entire operation is run all run in the spirit of compassion. A true desire for others to experience what you have. To achieve the same happiness you have. It all kind of recharges your hope in humanity and makes you want to contribute. I already have plans to volunteer for a course in August.

There are about 400 centers in the whole world. You can take your first course anywhere, as long as you have a way to get there. Check out http://www.dhamma.org/ for information on locations and schedules.

But as a final review, I just have to say that taking to this course was probably the best decision I've ever made in my entire life. I learned so much about myself, how I think, and why I've been unhappy. I learned how ignorant and prejudice I can sometimes be without even realizing. By becoming aware of your body, you become aware of your heart and soul. It makes you take a close look at yourself in the mirror and forces you to face your demons. Once you get to the root of things, your finally able to make amends and start anew. You literally purify your mind and heart of deep-seeded negativities that prevent your current happiness. After learning this technique, I can confidently say that I fully intend on continuing the practice. I can already see how it's benefiting me already and I want to see how much progress I can make.

I hope that someone who has read this post can sense my peace and happiness, and will at least consider applying for a course. Anyone who's still skeptical, I don't blame you. Even for me, it's still a lot to take in and I can tell it'll take a while to truly get back into the swing of things here at home. But the way I see it is, it can't hurt to give it a try. Seriously, it can't. There's no attempt to convert, no in-your-faceness about it. Just a true desire for to teach others a technique that will ultimately liberate them from all misery and unhappiness.

Really and truly, I know everyone could benefit from Vipassana. It really isn't about not reacting to the disappointments in life, but about not letting things get you down so much that they make you miserable. If you ask me, that's a pretty reasonable way to live.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Ready.

So guys, this will be my last post until I come back from Vipassana. I was just up late doing a little reading about the history of the course to better acquaint myself with what I'll be getting into. From what I gather, I am beyond fortunate to be able to participate in something like this, considering people come from all of the world to take this course. That said, I'm giving myself the next day to mentally prepare so I can full appreciate the experience. I knew that it would be difficult, but after reading up, it really hit me just how challenging this will be. But strangely, I'm not nervous. And, though I previously used the word to describe my feelings, I'm not "excited" either. The best way I know to describe myself right now is ready.

I'm keeping this post brief because it's late as it is, and I know it's going to suck trying to adjust to the new sleeping schedule (lights out by 9:30pm, awake by 4:30). But before I go, I just wanted to post this article I read from the website. It's pretty lengthy, so it's up to you whether you want to read it or not. I think you'll all find that it's very insightful. It's called "The Art of Living".

**Note: A common misconception about meditation is that it has religious connotations. While it is certainly a spiritual and mental experience, it isn't religious. Everybody can benefit from meditating, regardless of faith, creed, or religion. So, I hope that those of you out there who identify yourselves as Christians are not in the mindset that practicing meditation will somehow conflict with your beliefs:

It can be practiced by one and all. Everyone faces the problem of suffering. It is a universal malady which requires a universal remedy, not a sectarian one. When one suffers from anger, it's not Buddhist anger, Hindu anger, or Christian anger. Anger is anger. When one becomes agitated as a result of this anger, this agitation is not Christian, or Jewish, or Muslim. The malady is universal. The remedy must also be universal. Click here to read the full article. Feel free to explore the site when you're finished.

Anyway, I'll be back on June 14th, though it may take a while longer for me to post. I have a feeling it'll be best to slowly reintroduce myself to technology, so I may wait a few days before plugging myself in.

I hope you guys have great next 10 days. Wish me luck that I don't cheat/go crazy.

xo,
bloggal

Monday, June 1, 2009

Getting to Know Me

I promised dearest Gem that I would do this so here goes....

What's your current obsession?
Sunglasses and hats. You can never have enough of either.

What's your must have fashion need?
A supportive bra. You tiggle bittied gals out there know what I'm talking about. Without a comfortable/supportive bra, nothing looks right.

What are you wearing right now?
A t-shirt, plaid pajama pants, and a head scarf. Another lazy/rainy day.

What's your favorite food?
Italian/Thai ANYTHING.

What do you do for fun?
Hang with my sisters. We never fail to make each other laugh.

What made today special?
I nearly had a heart attack because I thought my financial aid was revoked aka I couldn't go back to school in the Fall. Long story, false alarm.

What would you like to learn to do?
Tight-rope walk, play piano, play chess

What's the last thing you bought?
Feminine toiletries? Ehh use your imagination :-/

What are you listening/watching right now?
My ceiling fan.

What's your favorite weather?
Cool and rainy. Days like this.

What's your one goal in life?
To live a good one. Yep. That's it.

What do you think of the person that tagged you?
Beautiful. Loving. Wise. Loyal. Awesomeness.

If you can have a house totally paid for, what would it look like?

A little something like this:



What would you like to have in your hands right now?
Not gonna lie. My mind went straight to the gutter.

If you can swap lives with anyone in the world for one day who would it be and why?
Ellen Degeneres. Just because she's hilarious, awesome, and down to earth.

If you can go anywhere in the world for the next hour where would you go?
Italy!


What language would you like to learn?
Italian and Latin. I know Latin is dead, but I wanna revive it.

What do you look for in a friend?
Someone I can depend on.

Who do you want to meet in person?

I'm slightly ashamed to admit this, but I'd want to meet Dane Cook. Yeah, I know he's a total douchebag, but he seems like he'd be kind of funny in person...

What's your favorite type of music?
I hate this question because there are so many. Love (good) Hip Hop. Mostly international but some American. Jazz--not so much the "smooth" stuff but the Miles Davis/Dizzy G./Bird type. I also love a contemporary spin on traditional music. I suck at genres and labels, so here's clip of one of my favorite groups, Gotan Project:

What's your dream job?
Curator/Columnist

Do you admire anyone's style?

I love Rihanna's style. It's bold and experimental. The chick can do no wrong in my book.

Describe your personal style?
It seriously depends on the day. Sometimes I'll go dressy casual (skinny jeans, dressy blouse, flats, and a jacket) or college bum chic (sweatshirt, jeans, and a hat). No matter what I wear though, they're mostly dark tones. Greys, blacks, burgandys, emralds. I love deep, rich colors.

What's your favorite t.v show?
Scrubs, Charmed, Sex and the City, Degrassi, The Biggest Loser

What's your favorite dessert?
Warm apple pie and vanilla ice cream.

What's your favorite makeup brand?

Seeing as I'm a thrifty chick, I'm not going to spew brands you'll only find in Sephora. Of all the drugstore make up brands that my meager pockets will allow, I'm going to have to say Covergirl and Maybeline are my faves.

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
In a small Italian village. Love love love Italian culture and lifestyle.

What's you fondest childhood memory?
Tea and toast with my granny. We still do it to this day, on occasion.

What would you do w/a major lottery winning?
Travel travel travel!

Rules:
1.)Respond: answer the questions on your blog.

2.)Replace one question that you dislike with a question of your own invention, add one more question of your own. (I replaced what is your favorite ice cream flavor with what is your favorite dessert?, and the question I added is the very last one.)

3.)Tag eight other people
Antithesis
Jaded
Experience
QQ
Robin
Karrie
Young Black Beauty
Ms. Moody