Sunday, March 1, 2009

A Work In Progress

Third post today...last one, I promise lol.

Just wanted to thank you all (again) for your words of encouragement and support. I love you all and I don't know what I'd do without you guys..Blah blah blah. I know I say this all the time lol. But it's really true.

I'm only quickly updating to let everyone know that I am a-okay. I know from what my previous post was, it probably sounds like I've been sitting in my room all day singing the blues, but no. I went to work this afternoon, and I intend on having a productive evening. I'm not the type of person to fall wallow in self pitty. Never have been, never will be. I've done an adequate job at bouncing back from my downfalls, and this time won't be any different.

I'll admit sometimes I do get tired of how mistake prone I am. It's like, damn, how many times can you make the same mistakes and not get it? But I've accepted that I'm the type of person who has to bump my head 20+ times before I can see the whole picture. It gets annoying, yes, but by the end of it all, I've learned 20 different lessons. When it's all said and done, and what I was supposed to get out of an experience is finally hammered in, I never go down that road again. I just hope that this was the final lesson in the Legacy of Ex. The final piece to this craptastic puzzle. I've never felt as repulsed as I do for him right now. Never had the desire to be as far away from him as possible. Never pitied his girlfriends as much as I do now. And I've never wanted to fight him in the face before either...So, maybe this really is it. Feels like it is.

6 comments:

Jaded said...

Even if it isn't *it*...cause lets be real it's hard to know. You have learned something valuable.

I know I've said this a million times but don't forget this feeling. I'm not saying carry it around with you; just don't forget it. Because it's THAT feeling which will help you in your resolve.

And I generally don't advocate doing shit like this but...if he does contact you tell his ass you're gonna tell his girl. (it's up to you if you really want to). I bet that'll keep him away.

Glad you were able to get back up and brush yourself off. And it only took a weekend from start to finish.

That's progress.

Keith said...

Hi Sydney- My first time commenting,but I have been lurking
for a good while.I love your blog
and I am certain that I will be returning. It's always good to make a new blogger friend.

Gem said...

I was going to say just what Jaded said. Hold on to this feeling. Even if you forget, make yourself remember. High fives all around.

Oh, and also I need you to get out for "fight him in the face". That damn KB...

Qucifer said...

I already did tell you to threaten him with telling as a good way to get him done with contacting you since you are NOT contacting him any damned ways

Bloggal said...

@ jaded: it IS really hard to know if this is "it". but from what i've expereinced this weekend, it would take a miracle for me to even consider giving him the time of day. because i know, if he ever tried to contact me again, that it wouldn't be for good enough recent for us to try to sustain a friendship. and at this point, i have no interest in being with him either. he's just not the type of person i can trust with my heart again. ever.

@ keith: thank you for coming by! glad you decided to comment. will be checking out your blog soon too:)

@ gem: HAHAHA i know man, i need to stop talking that broad. her vocab is startin to rub off on my ass. there seem like there was just no better way to describe my desire to, well, fight him. in the face.

@ qq: i have never not given a fuck as much as i do right now. if i wasn't afraid of him retaliating (cause he does have some dirt on me...but we'll go into that later) i wouldn't hesitate to tell her. i honestly do feel bad for the girl. she's comepletely oblivious to what kind of guy she's with. smh...she's in for a world of hurt in the future of he doesn't get his act together.

s a s h a said...

Lol. Kudos to u :]
but remeber this... Theres a thin ass line between love and hate. To hate someone... U'd have to give an effort to "feel" so just know. I learned that lil factoid from my sis... Hardtimes of a yung bronxiite :D

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