Am I the only one who absolutely adores the new Quiznos commercial?
I saw this edited version first:
So, I'm back at school. Wish I could say that my break rejuvenated me, but...meh. Not really. Being that the only thing I had to look forward to turned out to be a true hell date, can't say that my vacation was all that spectacular. But lemme quit complaining. The fact that I was able to sleep late, watch tv, and chill in pjs all day wasn't terrible. Not at all.
It's just that the whole Facebook drama with the BFF and my mom dominated the tail end of my break and kind of stressed me out. The whole next day my mother gave me the silent treatment. Sorta. She talked to me but only in short, cold tones. By the end of the night, I sent her an email (because she's not the confrontational type) apologizing for not standing up for her more. I told her that it hadn't quite hit me how disrespectful it was for my BFF to say those things to her, and how it may have made her felt that I let her off the hook so easily. I assured her that I'd never choose my friendship with the BFF over my relationship with her. The next morning, she called me to her room in tears and gave a really tight, long hug. She kept saying "thank you" over and over. And finally pulled away saying, "that's exactly what I needed to hear".
The reconciliation between my mom resulted in the grudge I'm holding with my friend. Well, not a grudge exactly. I just don't feel like talking to her right now. We're the types of best friends who speak daily, a few times a day. So going three days without verbal communication is kind of a big deal. But I am upset that she didn't consider how her comment would hurt and effect my relationship with my mother. Or at the very least, how it would effect my relationship with her. Again, my mom was totally wrong too, but my friend could've (and should've) been the bigger person. If only to save me the uncomfortable situation of having to choose. But since she didn't, I'm choosing to be my mom's ally for now. Regardless of how things turned out, I made the decision early on to deactivate Facebook. And for once, I really don't miss it.
I don't know if it was because of my date fiasco or if she's trying to give me the same advice she gave my best friend (act like a lady!) but as a parting gift, my mom gave me her copy of Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. She'd been reading it my entire break, and passed the torch like it was a bloody heirloom. I've been annoyed out of my mind that all you hear these days are women quoting the gospel according to Steve Harvey. But, I decided I'm not going to judge the book by its cover and give it a read anyway. Speaking of covers, <---this is a terrible one. I took the paper sleeve off because he reminds me too much of Mr. Potato Head. See the resemblance? Anyway, I hate the idea of jumping on the best seller bandwagon. However, I'm not opposed to self-help books and how-to guides because a select few CAN be helpful. So, I'll give Mr. Potato Head a chance.
Yall know how I have a hate/hate relationship with Facebook, right? Well, yesterday my disdain for this little social networking tool reached an all time high.
Let me start from the beginning. My mother is on Facebook. The handful of you who have their parents as friends know this is a true tragedy. You gotta keep things clean and wholesome. No drinking, cussing, sex talking. Not like my page would be raunchy anyway, cause I do prefer to keep my e-nasty reserved for the blog or twitter. BUT, you wanna have the option to say "fuuuuuck" in your status every once and a while.
Anyway, my best friend who I've mentioned several times here, is also friends with my mother on Facebook. Unlike me though, she lacks the filter that keeps her from saying ignorant/nasty shit on Facebook. Her latest example of this was a status that said: "If you can't have loud sex in your own house, where the fuck can you have it?"
That is actually a damn good question. But she even mentioned to me that she thought of my mom and our 8th grade teacher, who she's also friends with, when she set it. Out of respect for her elders, she shouldn't have published it. Or, she should have put them both on limited profiles, cause that's what I did for a while with my mom until she noticed.
Eventually, my mom did catch sight of her status and the convo went a little something like this:
honey, the world treat's you the way you demand to be treated. be a lady.
i've accepted my fate ms. s.
oh...wow. well, if you're going to do what you're going to do, don't let me stop you.
um, it was kinda supposed to be a joke.
well, if you're a joke--i'm mean IT'S a joke--than let me be the first to laugh at you. HAHAHAHAHA.
ohhh hardball...i know you don't care, but you're getting the limited profile...
no problem.
um, maybe you don't know the age limits of Facebook, but it's for OUR age group. maybe you're better off somewhere in an old folk's home where all the do is play bingo instead of being in my business. in any case, thank you for your advice though wasn't asked for nor considered.
Ugh bitch. FAIL.
I didn't see this convo unfold. My mom was updating me on their conversation as it progressed. I was annoyed by the entire situation as it was. My mom being on Facebook preaching to my friends about being a lady...But I feel like she was right to do so. She's a parent and that was the virtual equivalent telling my friend not to wear a hoochie ass skirt in public. Where things took a turn and the tone changed was when she called my friend a joke. Don't know why, but I was appalled when she told me that. Wasn't preachy anymore. Just kinda mean. Still in no way, shape, or form, justifies my friend's response. Oh, but don't think she got away with it.
While I'm on the phone with her and she is pleading and apologizing for what she wrote on my mom's wall, which at this point I hadn't seen, I hear these thunderous footsteps coming down the stairs. My mom bursts into my bedroom, snatches the phone, and goes to town on the bff. She called her everything from a hoe, slut, bitch, motherfucker, tramp, cunt, etc. It was brutal. And when she was done, she chucked my lil already handicapped phone to the floor. She picks it up, calls her back, and says: "Stay the fuck away from my daughter. I don't want her to end up like you!!!" Slams the phone closed and takes it. Remember when I made that post about eternally feeling like a child? This is why.
So, now my mom is pissed at me for still talking to my friend. She expects me to disown my friend of 12 years (and I'm only 20) because of what happened. I did put her in her place and defend my mother, but I'm not going to be an asshole to her nor am I going to hold a grudge. For one thing, that's just not my character or my way. I'm a very rational thinker when it comes to conflict. If something is thoroughly discussed, and someone sincerely apologizes for their actions, who am I to not accept. What my mom wants from me is to give her the cold shoulder for a while and since I'm not, I'm being accused of being disloyal and a traitor.
It would be a hell of a lot easier to be a grudgy bitch if I didn't feel my mother was more than a little inappropriate too. She has NEVER like my bff. Never. So, when things segued from nurturing to nasty, I was officially disappointed in the way she handled it. For one, I know my friend and she has an insanely dry sense of humor. Her comebacks were all supposed to be jokes. But when my mom came back with the "YOU'RE a joke" comment, it was just kinda like damn. And then after that, my mom calls her every nasty name in the alphabet...It was just a little too much on her end to make me feel like, poor her.
I'm on nobody's side here. They were both wrong and wildly inappropriate in my opinion. But I know some would disagree. When it comes to mommas, I know we're supposed to be alll O Hellllllll Naw. But what about when you don't agree with you're mother's actions? Is it okay to be on no side, or is that interpreted as being a traitor?
My mom seems to think so....But I know one thing is for sure. I need another Facebook break. The drama is killing me. I already get annoyed when I see it in my News Feed. But to be in the middle of this shit? It's gonna give me an aneurysm. I might just mass delete a bunch a folks cause to my surprise, people are discouraging me from deactivating it. I just get tired of drama in my life. Ugh. I fucking hate it.
Seriously though? We're really advertising having affairs now? I give up.
p.s.
This commercial isn't banned in all states, as the heading says. I just saw this ad on WE.
So yesterday was the big date. Before I opine about how it went, I'll give you a brief overview.
We met downtown at noon. We went to Subway for lunch. And then we went to a random vending machine/waiting room to talk. And that was the extent of the date.
Now, for the details:
He did arrive on time, which I was very gracious for. We met up at Millenium Park and he asked me if I had eaten lunch yet. I told him I hadn't so he suggested we go to Subway. We walked and talked a couple of blocks, and when we got there he told me that I could go ahead of him. I told him he could go first because I needed time to decide. He placed his order and then I placed mine. When we got to the register and the cashier asked, "seperate or together?" he turns to me and says, "you got this, right?"....Right. We sit down at a table and he excuses himself to use the restroom. Because there wasn't one in Subway, he went to a nearby building. 20 minutes later he comes back. At this point, I'm finished with my entire meal. We talk a little while and when he's done eating we get up and leave.
It's about 45 degrees outside but the lake effect made it feel more like 30. He asked me if I just wanted to walk around for a while, and I said "Ummm...no. It's freezing out here. Is there somewhere we can go to get out of the cold?" He says "There's this cafe I know of..." On the way to the cafe, this random guy asks us if he can take a picture of us. We decline. But as soon as he says, "C'mon man, you can make a quick $5."_____ stops dead in his tracks and agrees. We take the picture and he pockets the bill.
We continue walking to the cafe. When we get to the building, I realize that what he met by 'cafe' was a vending machine room that sold coffee and had tables set up in it. We sat down and talked there for hours until my mother called me. Because I had traveled from the suburbs, she was calling to find out if I needed a ride back home from the train station. I accepted her offer and we finally left. He walked me back to the train station, and we said our goodbyes.
What did you expect from a guy that doesn't have a car, my mom asked as I told her about the "date". I quickly corrected her that it wasn't about him not having a car OR making me pay for my meal OR not having any sort of itenerary planned OR not showing up looking (or smelling) presentable. It was the fact that there was just no effort. None whatsoever.
Now, maybe it was my fault for thinking this was a date when it wasn't. Apparently, to him all we were doing was hanging out. When a guy asks me on a date, I interpret that as two main things: He has a plan and he plans on paying. There was no planning involved, which sucked because I wasn't exactly familar with the area we were in. Granted, I am from the City. But I grew up on the Southside, not the downtown area. And by the time I made it to highschool, I moved to the suburbs of Chicago so it was harder to even get downtown without making a roadtrip out of it. Because he is more familar with that area, I expected him to at least have some sort of itnerary instead of basically asking me to lead the way.
Now let's get one thing straight: I'm soooo not materialistic or shallow. I already knew he was a struggling student and I was okay with that. I could deal with paying for my own meal and finding my own way to a date. But what was a major turn off was the fact that he didn't try. At all. I'm struggling too, but I still put my best face foward to leave a good impression. Though we met once or twice before, this was essentially our first real personal impression of each other. And he didn't try to make a good one at all. He showed up looking like he'd just rolled out of bed and smelling like he had just had a bomb ass workout. I felt extremely overdressed even though all I had on was jeans, flats, and a nice blouse.
I don't know if it was because of the lack of effort, but for some reason I just wasn't feeling him as much as I had been before. I mean, the conversation was okay, but the chemistry plummeted as the date went on. The romantic feelings that were once budding for him began morphing into friend feelings, and I knew then and there that ______ wasn't going to earn his nickname.
I spent $20 on food and transportation and now I only have $6 to my name. What sucks is that I can't even say the date was enjoyable. Truth be told, if I had known I would've had to spend my last pennies on this supposed "date" that he asked me out on, my broke ass absolutely would have declined.
So, please say it with me ladies: WOMP.
If I had to grade the date, I'd give it a D+. And the "+" is only because he was there on time.
Hellooooo lovers!
I've missed you guys bunches! Turned out my 'fake' blog break was a little more real than I thought it would be, huh? Won't go into the details of last week but I will say that I must of died and came back to life about four times. Most stress I've been in in a long time. So I guess it's a good thing I decided to break. Because I totally deserved it, I went out on Thursday night. Also the first time in a while. And I also decided to drink it up a little. Another first. But I'm a super duper lightweight so all it took me was a little medicine cup of some clear shit (no idea what it was) and an amaretto sour to get me buzzed. Had great great night but nothing to be ashamed of, trust me;-). Besides, I wasn't far gone (at all) since my girls were completely toasted. I may post pics but I know Heather might be a little upset if I do hahaha...
Aside from my night of partying though, nothing new going on here...yet. It's only day two of my break. I did a little light shopping so far. Today I'm thinking about getting myself a mani-pedi. You see, since I'm the only one in town right now, there's not much to do. All of my friends who are also on break are taking real vacations to Vegas, Miami, Cancun, California, etc. Yes, I'm the only one here in the Chi but I am determined to have a break full of fun, pampering, and much r&r.
Tomorrow is the big date with _______. The excitement of it has died down a little, which is a good thing. We're meeting downtown at noon for a play-it-by-ear sort of date. It could be an amazing time or a total bust. I'll let you guys know how it went.
Other than ______ , I met a couple of guys the night I went out. Again, I'm usually snooty about meeting guys in bars/clubs because the setting isn't quite conducive to getting to no each other. But I had a couple decent bar side conversations with a couple of sober fellows that I ventured to give my number to when they asked. I figured there was no harm in it because, if they were drunk, they wouldn't remember who I was anyway. To my surprised both of them called. But still, I'm not blogging about anybody or anything because it is most likely nothing to get all excited about. Just cute guys, good convo, and a fun time.
Hmmm...I think that's everything for now. I have been keeping up with you guys blog, just haven't been commenting. I kind of suck with that lately. I'll try to do better. Promise.
Also, for anybody who's following me on Twitter. Thought I'd just let you know that I won't be updating anymore. Tried it. It was exciting for about a week. And then I realized it wasn't quite for me. 1) I'm too much of a slacker already so Twitter took that to a whole other level and 2) it just felt a little voyeuristic to me. I felt like a stalker. I don't know why. I mean, I know that's the whole point of Twitter. But the idea of 'following' someone else's every tweet and move (and vice versa) kinda freaked me it. It was the whole reason I removed my site tracker. So, no Twitter for me guys. Maybe occasionally but nothing hourly. My life isn't interesting enough for something like that.
Anyway, I'll try to blog daily but I didn't bring my computer home so it may be a little difficult. I have a desktop and I figured there was no point lugging it back when I'd only be home for a week. So, I'll write when I can/something interesting is going on. Until then, I hope your weekend's have been great.
xo,
bloggal
I'm going on a fake blog break.I figured I might as well go ahead and make it "official" since I've been blogging negligently anyway. Those of you who've been around long enough know that I never really stay away. It's just that right now, I'm dealing with the a little thing I like to call Mid-Semester Monotony. It happens to me every single year. I get incredibly bored with my life/routine and I lose all motivation to keep at my schedule. Considering I hardly have enough enthusiasm to do my course work, I figured the best thing for me to do right now is cut out all extracurriculars. The fortunate part is, a break usually comes just in time for my MSM, which means the melt-down doesn't last long. Spring Break is now a little less than a week away...Whoot! Even though I'm not going on a "real" vacation, I'm still getting a very needed change of scenery. I swear, I'm not cut out for this college-town lifestyle. I've always been a city girl; I don't know what the hell possessed me to come to a school where the main attractions are cornfields.
No worries though, after I've taken this sabbatical, I promise to return with mucho gusto. It's not like I have writers block or anything. I just haven't had the time, energy, or motivation to write. School is killing right now...*sigh*. After break (or maybe even sometime during) I know I'll just be itching to write. Especially if things go accordingly.
Okay, guys. So there's kinda sorta possibly a new boo on the horizon. Maybe. I've neglected to write about him because I feel like blogging about potential guys kind of jinxes them. Or I get really annoyed when the guy turns out to be a total douche and I wasted time/space on him. Speaking of, remember Sir Texts A Lot? He and I fell off a while back because it was becoming increasingly clear that he didn't know what the hell he wanted. Said he wanted to be 'friends' and then he'd pull some relationshippy crap. We didn't make it past a first date or even to verbal conversation before I gave him the deuces due to inconsistency. He just texted me a few days ago asking me if I forgot about him. I told him I hadn't. But I was just tired of his ambiguity and didn't feel like putting up with a wishy-washy guy. I'm slowly started to realize that my Bull Shit-O-Meter is getting a super sensitive. Any hint at a Waste-O-Time and it starts blaring.
That said, I'm thinking this new guy is blogworthy. Even if things don't get off the ground, I won't be disappointed that I mentioned him. But still, I'm a little apprehensive about divulging too much information because don't want to get ahead of myself. So, here's a little background.
I met him at a party through a mutual friend over a year ago. He goes to a university in my home town so I've seen him the few times I visited my friend during breaks. There wasn't an instant connection when we first met, possibly because I was still heavily involved with Ex. We only mildly flirted via Facebook photo comments (lame) for the past year, but it wasn't until about a couple of months ago that we took the conversations to private messages. We talked that way for about a month and then we exchanged phone numbers. We've talked on the phone once a week since then, for no less than three hours each time. Loads to talk about, lots in common. He's a Libra, I'm a Scorpio--very cosmically compatible. He's the first guy I've talked to in awhile, who's in my age group but still older than me (21). He's attractive, though not quite my type (I prefer the chocolate brothas; he's high yellow). His only fatal flaw so far? Appears to be quite the ladies man. But what makes up for that is, he's very honest about what goes on him his life, so I couldn't really be shocked or surprised by what he does.
I generally turn my nose up at online/long distance hook-ups, but I'm feeling the way this one is unfolding. We met in person a couple of times, and we're bridging the Get-to-Know-Eachother gap through messages and phonecalls. Everything is still very wholesome (the Sex Conversation has yet to come up) and innocent. We're feeling each other out without the bias and hormones of face-to-face encounters.
I could go into detail about his personality (chill/laid back like me), our convos (never an awkward silence), and our chemistry (there's tons of it) but I'm going to leave it at that. In fact, I'm not going to even give him a nickname yet--he has to earn it. I'll just say, we've made plans to go on a date once I'm on spring break. Depending on how things go, I might have something interesting to blog about when I get back.
Anywhoo, this is my "last" post until I'm on break. I say "last" because for all I know, tomorrow I might just have to blog or something. You never know with me.
Take care you guys! I'll keep creeping your blogs <3.
xo,
bloggal
I just can't get enough of this song...
I wanted to embed the real video but it was disabled. Click here to watch it. It's hot.
Quick apologies for being away for so long. Last week was insanely emotional/hectic for me. Didn't have the heart to blog. My weekend wasn't much better.
Thursday
I worked from 5-9 after a long day of classes. Shortly after I get home, I catch word that there's a bomb threat at the dorm across the street from mine. I thought it was a rumor until I see all the cops outside with yellow police tape. Apparently they found a suspicious suitcase near the building and they didn't want to take chances because earlier that day, a bomb went off at another location on campus (WTF?). They ended up blowing up the suitcase and determining that there was indeed a bomb in it.
Friday
Usually my day off but I went to work a few hours at the gallery. I was looking forward to getting off though because I had plans with someone. Remember that guy who stood me up earlier this year? It was him again. He contacted me on Facebook and asked why I had disowned him. He apologized for his last shortcoming and asked if he could make up for it. I told him yes, but long story short, he stood me up again. I asked him why and he said "hahahahahah. my bad, i was slapped last night. it wasn't intentional." Epic fail negro.
Saturday
I worked (again) and crashed as soon as I got off. Woke up to do some homework but first went to the dining hall across the street (aka Ex's dorm) to get something to eat. I almost made it out without running into him but at the very last second, I turn around and there he is. Ugh. It was the most awkward its ever been but still, we pretended not to see each other and went our separate ways. The shit completely fucked up my focus so homework went out the window for the night.
Had an opportunity to be charitable that night so I did. Some dude frantically stops me in the street asking if I could spare any money cause his little sister had been picked up for being underage in the presence of alcohol. Even though I shouldn't have given a fuck, I still gave the dude $15. That's a hell of a lot for my broke ass. I don't know what possessed me to do it. He was all gracious and like, I promise I'll pay you back! He gave me his number to call him later. Just tried that shit and it was the number to a local laundromat...lol.
Sunday
Awaken by violent winds and hurricane ass rain. We had a tornado watch until 4pm, but I still had to go to work. While I was there all the power went out. I thought they were gonna let us go, but they made us stay for an hour in case the lights came back on. Being in a museum in the dark is sooooo not what's hot. The lights never came back on so they released us. Get back to my dorm to find out the power was down there too. Everywhere on campus, the power was down. Everybody was pissed because they couldn't access their homework, let alone eat. On top of that, there was a T.I. concert that people have been looking forward to for months. Best believe that shit was cancelled. What sucks is, the last time T.I. was supposed to be here was in the Fall of '07. But he didn't perform because this concert was the very day after he'd gotten arrested. I guess his ass just wasn't meant to perform here.
Lights stayed off from 3:30pm-9:30pm. Since the power was back on, we'd still have class today and be held responsible for work assigned over the weekend. Only problem was I had a shitload of homework I hadn't even started on and it was already 10pm. Stayed up until 4am (cause day light savings time fucked up my sleep) doing homework. But my ass managed to oversleep and so I ended up not getting credit for the work anyway.
And thaaaaat was my weekend. Just hope this week is better.
11 days til Spring Break...
I don't normally do chain letters but this one was kind of funny to me.
Just read the 'offense' and if you've done it, you owe that fine. Keep going until you've read each 'offense' and added up your total fine. Title your bulletin 'My Bail is $........' You don't
have to confess your answers, just the amount of your fine.
1) Smoked pot -- $10
2) Ever got drunk at work, or went to work while still drunk --$50
3) Cheated on your significant other -- $10
4) Been in love with two people or more at the same time -- $50
5) Said you love someone but didn't mean it -- $25
6) Went streaking -- $5
7) Went streaking in broad daylight -- $15
8) Kissed a co-worker-- $ 20
9)Kissed your boss --$50
10) Been arrested -- $5
11) Spent time in jail -- $15
12) Peed in the pool -- $0.50
13) Played spin the bottle -- $5
14) Done something you regret -- $20
15) Slept with your best friend >-- $20
16) Been in love with a stripper -- $20
17) Went skinny dipping -- $5
18) Been slapped-- $5
19) Slapped someone-- $5
20) Beat up someone -- $20
21) Been jumped -- $10
22) Ever had sex at church -- $25
23) Dated someone you met on My Space -- $25
24) Cheated on test -- $50
25) Vandalized something -- $20
26) Slept with someone in your parents' bed -- $100
27) Crossed dressed -- $10
28) Given money to stripper -- $25
29) Flirted with an officer to get out of a ticket-- $30
30) Had sex with more than 5 people -- $30
31) Kissed some one who's name you didn't know --$10
32) Hit on some one of the same sex while at work-- $15
33) Ever drive drunk -- $20
34) Used toys while having sex -- $30
35) Got drunk, passed out and don't remember the night before -- $20
36) Had sex in a pool -- $20
37) Masturbated -- $10
38) Cheated on your significant other with their relative or close friend --$20
39) Done oral -- $5
40) Got oral -- $5
41) Done / got oral in a car while it was moving-- $25
42) Woke up in the morning and did not know the person who was next to you-- $40
43) Stole something -- $10
44) Slept with someone who has been in jail -- $25
45) Made a dirty home video -- $15
46) Plan on making a dirty home video in the near future --$30
47) Had a threesome -- $50
48) Had sex in a public place-- $20
49) Been in the same room while someone was having sex -- $25
50) Stole something worth over more than a hundred dollars --$20
51) Had sex with someone 10 years older -- $20
52) Kissed a teacher while you were still a student--$25
53) Lied to your mate -- $5
54) Lied to your mate about the sex being good -- $25
I'm mad the only one that's $.50 is for peeing in a pool. Why they gotta put people on blast like that? I mean, I was like, 7 years old, and I really had to go so....
What's your bail? Comment here or repost on your blog.
This fool needs to be shanked. And Usher needs to be shot for laughing at his dumb ass.
This morning, my blog feeds were flooded with reports of Chris Brown and Rihanna getting back together. I clicked on the headlines, saw the incriminating photographs, and the comment sections that followed. The consensus was basically this:
That girl is stuuuuuupid.
Alot of people are saying that it's extremely irresponsible of her to go back with him because it's teaching other young women to go back to their abusers. Well, that might be true. But people need to realize that she is a growing young woman. She isn't perfect. And I know that everybody is saying, she's a celebrity. Being a positive role model comes with the job description. Fuck that, though. She's human, just like you and me. And she's going to make some dumb decisions. Just like you and me.
I think it's pretty obvious why I'm playing Stupid Girl's Advocate. I feel pretty ridiculous every time I have to blog about my latest shortcoming. But, thanks to my more experienced blog sisters, I'm starting to realize that every young woman is entitled to making a few stupid mistakes, major or minor. Young and old, we don't always make the best choices. Truth be told, she is super stupid to take Chris back. But, I can't help but empathize with her. How many times have I made the mistake of going back to Ex? Too many times to count. Making stupid relationship choices is a rite of passage. What sucks for Rihanna, is that she's making these stupid decisions on a world stage. Everybody can see it. And everybody's shaking their heads and wagging their fingers at her. I'm mortified enough to have blog world judging me. I can't imagine how she must feel.
I'm just saying, let her be stupid for a while. She's got to learn from experience. That's just how some people are. Some are smart enough to take heed to advice and not make the same mistake twice. For others like me, experience is the only way. After she gets her face pummeled a few more times, she'll figure it out. But until then, give her a break and quit being so damn judgmental.
Third post today...last one, I promise lol.
Just wanted to thank you all (again) for your words of encouragement and support. I love you all and I don't know what I'd do without you guys..Blah blah blah. I know I say this all the time lol. But it's really true.
I'm only quickly updating to let everyone know that I am a-okay. I know from what my previous post was, it probably sounds like I've been sitting in my room all day singing the blues, but no. I went to work this afternoon, and I intend on having a productive evening. I'm not the type of person to fall wallow in self pitty. Never have been, never will be. I've done an adequate job at bouncing back from my downfalls, and this time won't be any different.
I'll admit sometimes I do get tired of how mistake prone I am. It's like, damn, how many times can you make the same mistakes and not get it? But I've accepted that I'm the type of person who has to bump my head 20+ times before I can see the whole picture. It gets annoying, yes, but by the end of it all, I've learned 20 different lessons. When it's all said and done, and what I was supposed to get out of an experience is finally hammered in, I never go down that road again. I just hope that this was the final lesson in the Legacy of Ex. The final piece to this craptastic puzzle. I've never felt as repulsed as I do for him right now. Never had the desire to be as far away from him as possible. Never pitied his girlfriends as much as I do now. And I've never wanted to fight him in the face before either...So, maybe this really is it. Feels like it is.
When I song says everything you can't....
Let it die and get out of my mind
We don't see eye to eye
Or hear ear to ear
Don't you wish that we could forget that kiss ?
And see this for what it is
That we're not in love
The saddest part of a broken heart
Isn't the ending so much as the start
It was hard to tell just how I felt
To not recognize myself
I started to fade away
And after all it won't take long to fall in love
Now I know what I don't want
I learned that with you
The saddest part of a broken heart
Isn't the ending so much as the start
The tragedy starts from the very first spark
Losing your mind for the sake of your heart
The saddest part of a broken heart
Isn't the ending so much as the start
